In the spirit of challenging...again
Just did this conversation with my wife. I just cannot believe it that, without realizing it, I got this spirit of challenging back again in myself, the spirit that I used to have during my glory days. yup, i'm not making this up. I used to love challenges and challenge people around me for something better.
A little bit of history. When I was very young, I really don't like people around me to achieve something better than what I have achieved. It was like, if that person was successful, I will find a way no matter what, to steal that thunder from that person, so that I will be better than them. Okay, now do not get misunderstood. When I said no matter what, I meant in terms of efforts and studying, and of course not using any dirty tricks. Which means, I will increase my efforts, study harder and harder so that when my friends/teachers/family members talked about the ability of that successful person, I would be able to say "no big deal, I can do what he/she can do too" with all the pride. I still remember, when this friend of mine was able to memorize Ayatul Kursi and showed off to me, I then said to him "I can do that within half an hour!", then believe it or not, yup I did it! The point is, I want to be able to do what other people can do, and beyond.
Back to the present. When I voiced out my feelings about the challenges I faced lately at work to my wife, she simply said "I know you do it, and even better. I have known you, what you can do and all you abilities since our secondary school time." And that was the time I realized that, I have been missing that spirit, what I called the Challenging spirit. I don't recall since when did I lose it, after the O-level maybe? So, how do I know it is back? I don't really know how to express them in words, I just know it because I can feel the "heat" in my heart again.
So, what's next? I have a lot in my mind now, and slowly jotting them down on this virtual piece of paper. I am planning something bigger for this year and next year. Too much ahead of time? Of course, this is what they called planning. And yes, I always believe in fair competition, so if anybody would like to compete, then compete fairly. I am still felt pissed off by this some person who used some dirty and cheeky tricks so that everybody would look up on him/her. May Allah show this person the right path.
A little bit of history. When I was very young, I really don't like people around me to achieve something better than what I have achieved. It was like, if that person was successful, I will find a way no matter what, to steal that thunder from that person, so that I will be better than them. Okay, now do not get misunderstood. When I said no matter what, I meant in terms of efforts and studying, and of course not using any dirty tricks. Which means, I will increase my efforts, study harder and harder so that when my friends/teachers/family members talked about the ability of that successful person, I would be able to say "no big deal, I can do what he/she can do too" with all the pride. I still remember, when this friend of mine was able to memorize Ayatul Kursi and showed off to me, I then said to him "I can do that within half an hour!", then believe it or not, yup I did it! The point is, I want to be able to do what other people can do, and beyond.
Back to the present. When I voiced out my feelings about the challenges I faced lately at work to my wife, she simply said "I know you do it, and even better. I have known you, what you can do and all you abilities since our secondary school time." And that was the time I realized that, I have been missing that spirit, what I called the Challenging spirit. I don't recall since when did I lose it, after the O-level maybe? So, how do I know it is back? I don't really know how to express them in words, I just know it because I can feel the "heat" in my heart again.
So, what's next? I have a lot in my mind now, and slowly jotting them down on this virtual piece of paper. I am planning something bigger for this year and next year. Too much ahead of time? Of course, this is what they called planning. And yes, I always believe in fair competition, so if anybody would like to compete, then compete fairly. I am still felt pissed off by this some person who used some dirty and cheeky tricks so that everybody would look up on him/her. May Allah show this person the right path.
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